Tuesday, August 22, 2023

Why the Words of Jesus Matter More Than We Might Realize!

August 22, 2023
Tuesday 9:47 AM




    This morning i found myself listening to a short clip on Instagram of RC Sproul discussing that regeneration precedes faith. A deep and very important topic. A clear distinction was provided for me at the end of how different evangelism must be for an Arminian than from a Calvinist. 

    Previously, i have avoided using labels such as these but as i reflect back on the last 8 years in Christ, i realize how helpful it would have been to have had a better understanding of some Christian terms earlier on. There are two major camps in the area of soteriology (the doctrine of salvation) in Protestantism. One goes by the name of Arminianism and the other Calvinism. Eight years ago when my Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ came and found me and made me His own and reconciled me back to the Father, i not only had a sensational hunger for God's Word but i also had a desire to be around people that had come to long for the Lord Jesus like i did. The first logical place i thought to find those people were in church. Church - that's a whole other topic for another day. For now let's stay on topic. After seven years of attending four different churches for long periods of time i began to get discouraged and wondered if there were truly any real churches in our time. The Holy Spirit kept me strong in His Word and kept teaching me faithfully along the way, though! After the first seven years, two of which we didn't attend worship services but watched from afar online, my family could not not go to church any longer. We still had a longing to be with others that loved our Lord as well. We were led to a congregation that we had listened to for  six months online before we attended in person. Through those six months of listening online we didn't have the confusion that we had had with the previous four churches. Specifically on the conflict of what and how the Word of God was being preached. So we chose to attend this new church that we had been listening to online for six months in person and it was like falling into the arms of Jesus all over again! There were actually elders in this church, not just those on staff. The pastor actually preached the Word of God, not his own word. The preaching elevated Jesus, not the pastor or the church itself. The preaching was serious and honored, not preaching that sought laughs or aimed at entertaining people. There was actually joining of church members. Real covenantal commitments being made to one another, not just attenders when they felt like it or when it convenienced them. Doctrine was being taught, not just motivational speeches that talk about Jesus aimed at comforting my flesh. But rather, truth being proclaimed and my flesh being convicted! And the singing! The singing was Hymns, not the cultural make me feel good "Christian" music that passes as worship music these days. i know that comes across a bit harsh, but it's the truth. Singing hymns began to deepen the doctrines that i was learning and the reality of truth began to sink deeper into my soul! The Lord was reaching places in my heart that had yet to be touched with His Word! And this continues to this day! Oh the sweetness of the soul singing our Lord's praises unto His glory! 

    And then shortly after we started attending, I recall a particular moment when the pastor was preaching about the man that Jesus healed at the pool of Bethesda in John chapter 5. The pastor, my pastor, made a simple statement, "Notice that the man didn't know who Jesus was." With that little sentence along with all the personal study of the Scriptures the Holy Spirit was leading me through at home - it clicked! The light bulb turned on! i now understood why what was preached in the first four churches that it was us that decided for Christ, was wrong. This passage clearly taught otherwise! This man didn't know Jesus from Adam. Literally. (Which is a massive subject all on it's own and very important.) Jesus chose to heal this man! Jesus chose to forgive this man and change his life forever and this man had no clue who Jesus was. This man was rescued and NOT because He believed in the story about Jesus loving us, the way we are hammered to "believe" in Him in our age. What i'm referring to is the way someone tells you that Jesus loves you and died for your sins and if you "believe" that then you are saved and headed for heaven. It was apparent i had been listening to another gospel for those first seven years. A gospel that i had also heard at the age of sixteen and raised my hand, prayed a prayer and then got baptized. The gospel that did nothing and produced no other changes in my mind, heart or life than to make me falsely believe that i was saved and headed for heaven. 

    It was at this point i began to realize how important these labels are in Christian circles. And more important to know and understand when you are searching for, how the culture says it, "looking for a church home." Some churches are Arminian and some churches are Calvinistic in their beliefs, preaching and teaching. This matters tremendously. Why? Because one believes you choose Jesus and the other believes Jesus chooses you. It seems to be a subtle difference and maybe insignificant. But it absolutely is not! The gulf between the two is reminiscent of the subtlety of the serpent in the garden talking to Eve.  

    Let's listen to some of the words that came straight out of Jesus' mouth during His incarnation on earth: 

                    "It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have 

                     spoken to you are spirit and life. But there are some of you who do not believe." 

                     (For Jesus knew from the beginning who those were who did not believe, and 

                     who it was who would betray Him.) And He said, "This is why I told you that no 

                     one can come to Me unless it is granted him by the Father." - Jesus, quoted in 

                     John 6:63-65

Who gives life? Do we choose life? Do we choose to ask Jesus into our hearts? Who is it that Jesus says gives life? The Spirit gives life! 

How is it that one comes to Jesus? It is granted him by the Father.

   

    Let's also listen to what Jesus said just a few moments before He said these words. Before He said the above, He said:

                  "No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him. And I will raise 

                   him up on the last day. It is written in the Prophets, 'And they will all be taught by God.' 

                   Everyone who has heard and learned from the Father comes to Me -" - Jesus, quoted in 

                   John 6:44-45 

Who are the only ones who can come to Jesus? Those whom the Father draws to Jesus! 

What took place before they came? They heard and learned from the Father! 

Who teaches those who come to Jesus? God! 

 Jesus says those that come are taught by God! (Take notice in both passages above the Triune God is present - Father, Son and Holy Spirit!)

    

    These two passages above bring to mind Jesus' conversation with Peter in Matthew 16. 

                   "Now when Jesus came into the district of Caesarea Philippi, He asked His disciples,

                    "Who do people say that the Son of Man is?" And they said, "Some say John the 

                     Baptist, others say Elijah, and others Jeremiah or one of the prophets." He said to 

                     them, "But who do you say that I am?" Simon Peter replied, "You are the Christ, 

                     the Son of the living God." And Jesus answered him, "Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah!

                     For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven, And I 

                     tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell

                     shall not prevail against it." - Jesus, quoted in Matthew 16:13-18

Again, straight out of Jesus' mouth we hear the reality that the Father reveals truth! It was not that Peter chose rightly to guess the true identity of Jesus. Peter knew the true identity of Jesus because the Father revealed it to him! And on that revelation, says Jesus, He builds His church! It is not that we are just smarter or better than our neighbor and therefore we choose rightly to believe a story about God and Jesus and the Holy Spirit and heaven and hell. No! It is that salvation is of the Lord! Not us!

Two central important distinctions that you need to be aware of as a professing believer in Christ is:

1) There is a massive difference between Arminianism and Calvinism. 

2) Monergism - God is solely responsible and credited for our salvation. AKA: Calvinism

    Synergism - The teaching that we are in part responsible and credited with God, by our cooperation, for our salvation. AKA: Arminianism.

    Also, a term that is helpful in understanding the popular false teaching that is prevalent in many churches today is decision theology. It is the culprit of many false converts that are professing to be Christians that haven't the slightest clue about the Jesus of the Scriptures or Scripture itself. i know this all too well as i was one of them before the Holy Spirit regenerated my soul. Another term that is of importance is the doctrines of grace. Dig in! Do the research and see for yourself! And most importantly, to quote the Father in regards to His Son, (Matthew 17:5, Mark 9:7, Luke 9:35), "This is My Son, My chosen One; listen to Him."

    All of this as a backdrop for my opening lines of how different evangelism has to be for an Arminian and a Calvinist. If you're an Arminian you must be sharing Christ with someone and hoping that you are saying just the right things at just the right time in full dependence upon the person you're talking to. How so? You're depending on them making the right decision to believe what you are telling them. And not only are you depending on them, you're depending on your own abilities as well. Not that we should be utterly irresponsible and loose with the Gospel, but an Armianian is more likely to look to self and the person they're witnessing to because they believe they actually took some part in the salvation of their own soul. Whereas a Calvinist, knowing that they had absolutely zero, zilch, nothing to do with their salvation is in absolute full dependence upon the Triune God for the regeneration of the soul of the one to whom they are witnessing. Knowing that God, and God alone, CAN give life to a dead soul leaves us as we always are, at the complete mercy of God! Not looking to our intellect, our communication skills or our abilities. Nor does it leave us at the mercy of the intellect of the person with whom we are speaking. We are entirely dependent upon the Triune God of the Scriptures to breathe life into the person we are speaking to. In other words, the result of the conversation is in God's hands, not ours and not the person we're speaking with.

Let us consult the Scriptures and listen in on a letter Paul wrote to the Corinthian church as he is helping them understand how they came to have faith in Christ:

    

                     "What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through who you believed, as the 

                      Lord assigned to each. I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. 

                      So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who 

                      gives the growth." - Paul, recorded in 1 Corinthians 3:6-7

    We can no more be a part of our salvation or anyone else's for that matter than we were a part of our own existence in the first place. Salvation of any human being is fully dependent upon God! Not His people! But what an incredible privilege we have been given to have been entrusted with the truth to proclaim! And that God Almighty chooses to use His word about His Son coming out of our mouths as a means for the Holy Spirit to reach His people! Amazing!

    One last thought! Once you have been given the eyes to see this reality in His Word, you see it everywhere in Scripture! You'll wonder how you could have missed it all this time. The thing is, we allow the words of others, even when it comes to God's Word, to have influence in our thinking and our view of things. We tend to listen to others and what they have to say about God's Word more than we listen to God Himself in His Word. Thank God He gives more grace and grants us repentance! 

Grace and Space for you and for others, no matter what it looks like!  

Romans 11:36; solideogloria!
Psalm 19:14; coram deo!

Here is the video clip i ran across this morning of R.C. Sproul as well as a link to a chart that gives a visual of the differences between Arminianism and Calvinism. May the Lord bless you with knowing His salvation! 










  




                     


                     


  




Tuesday, March 21, 2023

Lies

https://drive.google.com/uc?export=view&id=1BZ5s1uTwCgOqi9vJnrgO0Xa88meLxOCn

Often, our sinful nature convinces us that we must lie to protect ourselves, or perhaps to protect others. 

This is why God’s Word tells us:
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3‬:‭5‬-‭8‬ ‭ESV‬‬

When we have fear, especially the fear of someone finding out an ugly truth about us, our sinful flesh drives us and rules over us to lie for our own “good” and our own “protection.”

But God, from whom all wisdom and truth is given, first in Exodus 20:1-17 and again in Deuteronomy 5:1-21 commands and directs His people in the 9th commandment not to bear false witness, aka: do not lie. And later in Proverbs, chapter 3, verses 5-8 we are given direction by the Word of God to trust in the LORD with all our heart. This includes even when we have fear and are scared. And then His Word proceeds to tell us HOW to trust in the LORD with all our heart. 
We are NOT to lean on, depend on or trust our own understanding.
We ARE to acknowledge and consult Him, by His Word, in all our ways. 
We are NOT to be wise in our own eyes. Rather, 
we ARE to fear/respect/believe/honor/trust the LORD by turning from evil. 
From what evil?➡️From leaning on and trusting our own understanding. This sounds extremely familiar to Jesus’ command to deny yourself daily! And lastly, what does God say is the result? Proverbs 3:8 reveals the reality behind these commands of God. 
“It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭3‬:‭8‬ ‭ESV‬‬
And these words sound extremely familiar to Jesus’ proclamation and command from Matthew 11:
“All things have been handed over to me by my Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and anyone to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.””
‭‭Matthew‬ ‭11‬:‭27‬-‭30‬ ‭ESV‬‬

In the above few verses and commands Jesus reveals to us a reality that the sin IN us hides from us. The sin IN us rules our flesh, our nature, our desires and ultimately or hearts. He confirms this reality elsewhere. For example in Jeremiah 17:9 and Mark 7:21-23. We are defiled humans. The Triune God revealed to us in the Holy Bible, KNOWS the reality of our condition and desires to rescue His people from trusting our sinful flesh! 
Why?➡️Well, in our sin we are only deserving of His wrath. 
Why?➡️Because we continue to be wise in our own eyes and we trust our own understanding of the world and the creatures (us) He created. And as long as we continue to be our own god or follow a god we’ve imagined to be like us - in our sin - we continue to pursue, not His purpose for creation, but our own wicked, evil purposes. 
And what does that produce?➡️Tears, hurt, pain, and ultimately the death we not all only observe around us, but that we inflict upon others and that others inflict upon us. 

Sin IN us and sin around us deceives us. It leads to destruction 100% of the time. And  destruction is a reality that sin convinces us to long for. Does that sound silly to you? It does to me. It sounds ridiculous to say we long for destruction. But it’s the truth. In our fallen state we come to enjoy and take pleasure in sin. We like it. It makes us feel good. But God has created us in such a way to never be fully satisfied in sin! He created us to only, ever and finally be satisfied in Him! 
Why?➡️
Because He knows us far beyond what we could know about ourselves!
Because He desires better for us than we desire for ourselves!
Because He loves us far beyond what we conceive love as!
He IS our Creator! 

He is God and we are not! And by His grace alone are we delivered from sin and death. Aka: trusting self. 

Look to Jesus alone for reality!
Look to Jesus alone for truth!
Look to Jesus alone for rescue and help!
Look to Jesus alone for what is good!
Look to Jesus alone for protection! 
Look to Jesus alone for freedom!
Look to Jesus alone for forgiveness!

We cannot EXPECT The loving & justful Triune God to make sin comfortable for His images! But we can ASK our Creator of all that is, was and ever will be, to gift us faith! Faith in His Son Jesus Christ, the One & Only Savior of all His people!

In reality, there is only one race that lives upon the earth. ➡️The human race!
But make no mistake about it; the human race is divided!
Those whom trust themselves, honor themselves, worship themselves and obey themselves in rebellion to The Holy Triune God of the Scriptures. 
And those, whom are His! Those whom He has called out of the world and rescued from sin by His grace alone! 

Unbelievers, born only of the flesh that look at God’s commands and trust they know better for themselves.
And believers, born twice, of the flesh and of the Holy Spirit from above that look at God’s commands and KNOW they are for our good and are our protection! 

Whose are you?

Only God - Father, Son and Holy Sprit will make your paths straight! 

Grace and space for you and for others, no matter what it looks like! 

Romans 11:36; solideogloria!
Psalm 19:14; coram deo!


Tuesday, October 4, 2022

Are You Male or Female? There's No Other Option!

We, the church, the bride of Jesus must not be idle in our culture! May we be faithful to represent our King on the earth as His body! 

Education has been re-defined and reconstructed to revolve around evil, fallen world, and sin-filled ideologies. Much of what is being presented today as "education" is wicked and abusive. 

True Education was, is and always will be the passing down of the knowledge and wisdom of God from generation to generation! The Absolute Truth! Without the wisdom of God, Truth and the Holy Scriptures humanity has always fallen in on itself. Sound/look familiar? 

If we profess to be Christians, may we understand the reality of what our mouth professes! May our hearts profess and be near to our Lord! 

Becoming a Christian, a follower of Christ, a disciple of Jesus, is not something we can make ourselves into ("i identify as a Christian") NO. The Holy Spirit regenerates us into new human beings applying the salvation to us that was purchased by Jesus! We are born-again, from above, not of the flesh, but of the Spirit! Thus changing EVERYTHING! 

i am now 7 years into being a new woman in Jesus by the grace of God alone and for the last 9 months or so i have been discovering just how CRITICAL Genesis 1:27 is to our being, our theology and our faithfulness to our Creator! 

⚠ Do not take lightly or dismiss too quickly the FACT and the REALITY that in being created to image God, He chose to create us as men AND women. Male AND Female! 

We must acknowledge and respect this reality and seek to understand why! He has not left His people clueless and wandering on this earth! He has preserved His written Word for us to seek Him and to know Truth! May we not compromise and allow weakness/laziness/cowardice disguised as "niceness &  inclusivity" to deceive us! 

We must first acknowledge our purpose - to image our Creator! Secondly, we must ask how?

Our understanding the HOW is crucial! Gender matters! Not just the acknowledgement of male and female. Yes that, but so much more! We were not created the same! Our attributes are not the same! The way we communicate is not the same! The way we observe is not the same! The biology of our bodies is not the same! 

Our mission IS the same - to image Him - but the HOW is not the same! Don't miss this privilege and opportunity to image Him faithfully on His terms! May we STOP living out the HOW being wise in our own eyes! May we honor our Lord and start living out the HOW by His wisdom! May we look to the very Word of God and ask the Holy Spirit to lead, teach and feed us what is there for our understanding and nourishment!!! 

His people are to be masculine and feminine according to His wisdom, not ours! We will be held accountable! His grace is not a license for laziness. What is it you invest your time in? More money? Entertainment? Self-care and self-help? Comfort? 

Time is a gift! A gift from God for the glory of God! Don't waste it! Matthew 6:33! 

May we have ears that hear and hearts that desire not only to know truth, but also to shema (hear & obey) truth! 

Below are links to a few other resources that are beneficial! 

#graceandspace for you and for others always, no matter what it looks like! 

The Council On Biblical Manhood and Womanhood

The Danvers Statement

The Nashville Statement


Wednesday, August 31, 2022

Are You Waiting For the Rapture?

For over 2 years in Amarillo, Texas my family attended a Calvary Chapel. We enjoyed our church family but there was always a state of confusion why there was an incredible amount of pulpit time dedicated to rapture rhetoric. There was a fine point focus of the nation of Israel as well. It was so confusing as to why we were always being drilled with "rapture out of the earth" talk & teaching when the Bible clearly teaches we are waiting for the return of our Lord & King, Jesus. 

My family's choice to eventually leave the Calvary Chapel came down to a move of the Holy Spirit that exposed this exact notion shared by a man named George Mueller:

“My brother I am a constant reader of the Bible, and I soon found out what I was taught to believe (by Darby’s doctrine) did not always agree with what my Bible said. I came to see I must either part company with John Darby, or my precious Bible, and I chose to cling to my Bible and part from Mr. Darby.” – (George Mueller, a contemporary and one time supporter of John Nelson Darby) 

We chose to part with our Calvary Church pastor and congregation due to a teaching we didn't even know a name for until a couple of years later. This system is called Dispensationalism. Below is a brief video overview of Dispensationalism and its dangers as well as a letter written a number of years ago to Calvary Chapel. It is incredibly insightful and necessary. 




i share this out of love for my Lord Jesus Christ and His Gospel as well as love for those drowning in deception. May the truth set you free!

For His glory alone! Jesus is Lord and King! Coram Deo!

Grace and space for you and for others, no matter what it looks like! 

Our words, our choices and our actions reveal our loyalty and allegiance!


















Tuesday, August 30, 2022

Women, Step Out of That Space, It's Not Ours!


Absolutely 💯! 

As His bride, we - His body, His church - would NEVER dream of expecting to have any authority over Jesus! Why would we, as women, then expect to have authority over men and our husbands? 

Women, do NOT fall for egalitarianism within the church. 
And women, do not fall for the feminism agenda inside or outside the church. 

The reality is we already have. But we absolutely have been freed from believing the lies any longer! 

The sin nature of fallen woman is revealed clearly in Genesis 3:16 & Genesis 4:7. 
💥Notice the pattern and allow Scripture to interpret Scripture! Our independence and our desires to control & rule over (pounce) men is a dangerous, destructive and deadly effect of the fall. This aggressive part of our nature is NOT something to be proud of, rather we are to be denying it and killing it daily, by grace and full reliance upon the Holy Spirit in us, women of God! 
#ephesians5v22 #submission is beautiful in the design & economy of God!  #kingdomofGod  #kingdomofheaven #fittosubmit 

🛑Stop believing the degraded, devaluing picture the culture has created of submission. 🛑Stop desiring #independence...the more you desire and seek #autonomy the further you are running FROM God. 

Authority & power under control is provision & protection! Jesus is the ultimate picture of #headship! May we be obedient to God's commands as He has rescued us to do & trust Him for the results! His desire is to care for, provide and protect you. To love you! And He has! 🛑denying Him!

May we ask to be granted repentance and step out of the space that God designed men & husbands for! May we trust and obey God's call on us as women! May we take joy and pleasure in our God-given lives and worship our Lord in the way(s) He has instructed us! His ways lead to life, abundant & eternal life! To know Him is to know love & live! #SoliDeoGloria #coramDeo 

#graceandspace for you and for others, no matter what it looks like!

Thursday, August 18, 2022

The Deception of Socially Acceptable SINS


Seriously, slow down and think about this.

💥Light exposes that which is in the dark. When Christ shines His light through His people - those in the dark will resist, flee, be angered and be offended.

John 3:19-20
And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness (♥) rather than the light because their works were evil. For eveyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.

Being of the light exposing darkness in love is an important part of how we image our Creator and how we imitate our Savior. Our culture, the fallen world in which we dwell, campaigns to instill fear by selling this false notion of "to tolerate is to love"...which the opposite is actually true. To leave someone in deception in their sin is the most UNloving thing we could do. 💥To not tell people the truth for FEAR they will probably not like you as much is self-centered pride, not love! Love rejoices with truth! Love desires that the captives be set free!

Here are a few of our cultures greivous, heinous SINFUL ways that are not only tolerated, but celebrated and fought for. 

♥Autonomy/Indepence...from God
♥Ingratitude
♥Abortion
♥Women using their bodies as weapons to gain control of mens eyes, therefore gaining control of their minds. 
♥Men using women for their perverted darkened lustful thoughts.
♥Re-defining what it actually means to be truly human.

♥Re-defining manhood.

♥Re-defining womanhood.

♥Re-defining parenthood.

♥Re-defining education.  
♥Sex outside of marriage
♥Living together before marriage
♥Re-defining marriage as anything other than a covenantal union between one man and one woman.
♥Re-defining what a living human being is simply because they are in the beginning stages of life.
♥The Feminism Movement, to include "evangelical feminism."
♥The pursuit of happiness, not holiness.
♥Idolatry of all kinds
♥Materialism
♥The love of money 

♥Not seeking the kingdom of God and His righteousness FIRST.

♥Believing our ways are better than God's ways.
♥Not knowing what it truly means to be:
a human
a man
a woman
♥Creating our own identities apart from God.
♥Not seeking truth.
♥Not living out our purpose as image bearers of God...to be fruitful and multiply.
♥The spiraling breakdown of the family.
♥Not looking to God to define what is good and not good (evil). Biblically known as doing what is right in our own eyes.
♥Telling people that God loves them just as they are...See Psalm 5:5-6 for just one example. If God loved us as we were, why Jesus & the cross?
♥The false notion that everyone is God's child.

♥Women in pulpits.

♥Men and women in pulpits "preaching" their word, NOT God's word. 

♥A pastor from the pulpit declaring someone "saved" just because they raised their hand. A dangerous deception. 
♥Knowing what we should do and not doing it.
♥And there are so many more....but these are just a few SINS that many in the American culture are proud of.

Just know,

There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.
Proverbs 6:16‭-‬19 ESV

Don't run from the light, run to Him! It is only Jesus who has the words of eternal life! See John 6:68! May you no longer be held captive by the devil doing his evil wicked works!

May He set you free! 🕊

Wednesday, August 10, 2022

Women, Did You Know?


 My dearest fellow females,

Are you proud of your independence? Are you seeking to ensure that you can take care of yourself no matter what life continues to throw your way? Are you seeking to secure for yourself, and possibly your kids, what you know no one else will? 

Why would i ask you all these questions? 

The answer to that question is going to sound corny and cliche, but the truth remains. i ask you these questions because i love you. I don't have to know you personally to love you, all i need to know (and i do) is that you are a fellow female in this world created by my Father and that fact is the basis for my love for you. 

Let me address one quick thing before proceeding.    i.     i know that our grammar rules teach us that "i" is supposed to be capitalized. But, i have come to know a more important teacher than our culture and our grammar rules. This teacher, The Teacher of teachers, has taught me that I should actually be i. So, now that we have addressed the "grammatical error" let us move on! 

Back to our questions about our independence and ensuring our security in this world. For the first 37 years of my life i was taught, through numerous avenues, that as a woman it was my duty and responsibility - my mission - to be independent. Meaning, able to take care of myself without the help from anyone else, especially a man. Has this been your experience as well? 

i married just out of high school and almost immediately became pregnant. Long story short, two children and four years later, i filed for divorce. This left me with consequences i never saw coming as a single mom and being the sole provider for these two children. Desperate situations call for desperate measures, right? i had identified the problem as my ex-husband. It was him that was the problem, so now i just needed to find another man, not like him, but better. So the hunt was on and within two years, i married again. And unexpectedly, we ended up divorcing after 1 child and 4 years as well. Why? Well, this time along the same logic of the first divorce, i had identified the problem as my husband and thought i had found a better one than him. So of course it made perfect sense, the right thing to do was to get rid of the current husband and pursue a relationship with this "better man." 

After only two years with the "better man" it became apparent that he was the problem as well. So i did the only logical thing, i re-married my second husband, again! Huh? Yeah you heard me right, i re-married husband #2. We tried much harder this second go around but it still included separations and affairs, but at least divorce was not an option. 

After 11 years into our second marriage, something amazing took place! And when i say amazing that word is incredibly insufficient to communicate the reality of the transformation that took place in our lives and in our marriage. This transformation was family wide. Meaning, it did not just impact us in our marriage but it got to the very root of things influencing our lives in all arenas as we had known them. 

My husband and i began to see one another differently. We began to see our roles as husband and wife differently. Our parenting style immediately changed. Our goals for our future and the immediate present transformed. It was weird and we didn't completely understand this blissful, yet complicated transition that was taking place in our lives. Right at the same time all of this was occurring at age 37, i had an urge to order a Bible online. i had professed to be a Christian since i was 16 after raising my hand to an altar call, repeating a prayer and getting baptized. i was told that i was then "saved" and no one could snatch me out of God's hands so i thought i was secure in the "church, spiritual, religion" department so from that point forward i focused on being "happy." And i have already shared my journey to "happiness." 

Okay, so back to the BIG CHANGE that was taking place in our lives at 37. i got that Bible in the mail and began reading it. I get to John, chapter 3 and overheard Jesus' conversation with Nicodemus as Jesus is telling him that he must be born again in order to see AND to enter the kingdom of God. The complete shift that began to take place in my mind and my heart is truly un-explainable. i cannot put into words the complete about-face our lives have taken. The changes have been radical and immeasurable! 

In short, by His mercy, God gave birth to me from above. i know how weird that sounds, but it is absolutely true! i did not even understand all of the changes that were taking place in my life until i received that Bible and began reading it. The more i read, the more i was given insight and understanding to what was taking place in me! And not just me, but my family! The more i read the Bible the more truth i understood. And the more truth i understood the more i realized how much of my life was based on lies. Beginning with the whole "independence" thing. Holy cow, how was i 37 years old and did not know that i was born dead. Dead meaning separated from God, exiled from His presence. i was not born God's child. i was born, as default, the devil's seed (child). i was born a sinner. Sinner meaning an enemy of God seeking autonomy (independence). i was born in the dark. Dark meaning influenced only by satan and sin. i was born blind. Blind meaning not able to see and know the things of God. i was born a fool. Fool meaning that i trusted myself and my thoughts and the culture and "education" all around me, whether it be what i learned in school, from my parents, from music, from television, advertising and the list could go on and on. How was i 37 years old, married, a mother of 3 teenagers and this was news to me? i never knew. Honestly, i never knew. But, as i read the Bible, my life, my choices, my trials, my tribulations, my traumas, my confusion, my circumstances all began to make sense. Perfect sense. 

i won't go into details (sometimes, no, a lot of times, that is my weakness) but i will share this video with you. This message is only about an hour of your entire life to hear the truth! These are truths that God, our Creator, has authored and preserved for us to know! Truth is the only key to unlocking us from the mental prison we have been in all our lives. Truth is the light that shines in the darkness and exposes ALL THE LIES we have believed since birth! Truth is the bread we have been hungering for! Truth is the water our souls have thirsted for since we can remember! Truth is life! Truth is the freedom we have truly been longing for all our lives! Truth has a name and His name is Jesus! May He set you free like He did me and my family! To Him alone be the glory! Amen! 

⚠When we wrongly identify the problem, we seek the wrong solutions.